Used to be a ‘new’ Jersey Girl   : now A Colorado Girl

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Taking up trysts with Johnny once again

I can’t help myself. It’s that time of year when I take up my trysts with Johnny once again. We meet once a week, intimately, for about 2+ hours or so. I ride him; control him. Sometimes he bucks and kicks and gives me fits, yet we manage to smooth things over. He can be obstinate but I usually have the upper hand. Both of us end up satisfied at the end of it all. If you don’t know who Johnny is, you’d better follow the link provided above. And shame on you for not reading my archives!

He seems to be having a few issues this year. One particularly annoying, and life threatening part of his repertoire seems to be a steering issue. Make a turn too tight or fast and you find that the steering wheel is stuck. This usually happens when headed straight for a tree or one of the boulders that sprout from our yard.
Look out ahead!
Only fast thinking and a good strong wrench of the wheel can save you. Several times I’ve come close to crashing into something, so I’m really careful now. Really now, wouldn’t you find that annoying as you-know-what?

The other issue is that he seems hungry all the time. If not completely—and I mean completely—full of gas, he coughs and sputters going uphill. With our yard, uphill comes as part of the package. Up the slope, down the slope. No getting around it. Can’t go across the slope because you might tip over. [There is only one true flat spot in our yard and we’re thinking of turning it into a boules court.]

Maybe he didn’t like his winter vacation in the shed instead of the garage. Or maybe he’s decided he doesn’t like New Jersey because it’s too much work. But more than likely Johnny just needs a little spa time. We need to make and appointment with the travelling Deere Spa to come and give him a going-over. Maybe then he’ll mend his ways.

Lynne Robinson, Hewitt, New Jersey

Comments:

C’mon, Johnny! Summer is here - kick it into HIGH GEAR, please!!

Don’t worry, Lynne, he’ll rise to the occasion!

Oh, Reya, you made my day!! What a line!~now why didn’t I think of that one? Perfect!

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