Wednesday, April 01, 2015

News Flash! Black Panties Found at West Milford Public Library

This morning I went to the library to return a few books that I had checked out but decided not to read. As I walked up to the library entrance I noticed something black lying in the middle of the sidewalk. I started to bend down to pick it up, assuming it was a scarf, but as I looked closer I could see that it was a pair of black women's underwear. At least I thought that's what it was.  No way was I picking them up to find out for sure! 

I walked into the library and up to the front desk where two women were behind the desk checking in books. I told them about the undies and they just looked at me increduously. Then they started to laugh. I said I don't think you want them hanging around out there. They talked between themselves about what to do and they agreed that it was too good to pass up, that the head librarian should be told to go out and get them. I heard them call her on the office phone and it was clear she didn't believe them, so she told one of the women to go out and look for herself. She said you aren't trying to spoof us for April Fool's are you? I had completely forgotten what day it was and now my little announcement seemed suspect even to my own ears. No, I assured her, I am not.

She went out and came back in with her hand over mouth to stop from laughing out loud. Yup, she said. They are black underwear for sure. She called her boss back and told her that yes indeed it was true. In a few mintues the boss appeared with a plastic bag over her hand. She looked at me and said I thought you were April Fooling us, laughing as she said it. I told her no way would I pull such a stunt! (They all know me at the library.)

While she went outside to pick up the panties the other two women speculated how they had gotten there. Could they have been stuck with static electricity to someone's pant leg? This caused even more outbursts of laughter. The woman who had gone out to check on my story said, no way those panties are too big to be overlooked. More laughter. 

After a few mintues the boss returned holding the plastic bag with the mysterious black panties inside. They wondered if they should put them in Lost and Found. 

All in all, we all had a good laugh. And in case you are wondering, no this was not an April Fool's post!


Welcome, I'm Lynne. You know me better as a 'new' Jersey Girl. But now I've moved once again, this time to North Carolina. Here I write about my thoughts, good food, and of course, dogs.

© 2006-2023 Lynne Robinson All photography and text on this blog is copyright. For use or reproduction please ask me first.

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